Important: Wonder Woman

If you have not seen Wonder Woman yet, I’m taking away your woman card.

Go see it. NOW. And then go see it again. Because it’s fucking important. These are images you, and everyone need to see.

You’re sure as shit I saw it opening weekend. And I almost cried five times, mostly during battle scenes, because I was floored by how I had never seen (or had rarely seen) these things on film before, not treated like a crazy novelty:

-Female directors

-Female directors of action movies

-Female directors of superhero movies

-Female directors of giant summer blockbuster movies

-Women leading on set

-Women leading on-screen

-Women leading in battle

-Women training for battle

-Women with wrinkles and scars, as the most valued people in a society

-Women with wrinkles and scars leading

-Women with wrinkles and scars leading IN BATTLE

-Women with wrinkles IN BATTLE

-Women in a ten minute fight scene doing every single thing you want to see in a ten minute fight scene

-Women whose clothing was completely functional. For moving.  And kicking. And reaching for arrows. And swording. And jumping on and off of horses. While kicking and moving and shooting arrows and swording.

-Women unashamed of their bodies, women who would never even think that they’d be objectified, women using their legs as things that propel them and stabilize them and support them, for everything BUT slow motion sun-flare, looking back over your butt, sexy action girl shots

-Men as secondary characters

-Men as the love interest and quirky sidekick at best. (And one lame generic “Imma destroy humanity!” bad guy.)

-An evil woman villain (because you must be respected to be considered a threat)

-A super smart chemist woman who’s essentially the bad guy army’s secret weapon

-Sincerity, warmth, and lightheartedness that was just nice and human, not record-scratch schmaltzy or dumb

but mostly:

THIS!!!!ww and patti jenkinsgal-gadot-e-patty-jenkins-maxw-654104495214-wonder-woman.530x298wonder-woman-gal-gadot-and-chris-pine-on-world-war-i-setwonder-woman-amazzoni593ff1b91d00002900cc2ac9.jpgmqdefault412ABDF700000578-4596296-image-m-17_1497279646861Screen Shot 2017-06-21 at 3.39.06 PM.pngwonder-woman-4gallery-1489058413-wonder-woman-amazons-on-horseback-robin-wrightlandscape-1496864038-wonderwoman-clay-enos-warner-bros-entertainment-inc-ratpac-dune-entertainment-llc-10.jpgmaxresdefault-1.jpgWonder-Woman-Gal-Gadot.pngwwp1jpg-f9b324_1280w.jpgwonder-woman-poster.jpg

WW3

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It’s not that I want more violence, it’s that showing someone in a violent situation sends a message that says: THEY CAN DO THAT. They are capable. And the way it’s handled in Wonder Woman is: OF COURSE THEY CAN DO THAT. (And this, and that and everything.) It pointed out how crazy it is that we’re totally brainwashed into thinking that woman maybe can’t this or that. This film simply shows women as equal to men. Literally. Just equal. Just doing the same things guys do in every single movie ever. AND IT IS SHOCKING because we simply DON’T SEE THAT.

And that is FUCKED up.

Need more now forever lots please, thank you Patty Jenkins.

(And the writers: Allan Heinberg, Zack Snyder, and Jason Fuchs.)

Running low on haterade…?!

I’ve got a serious problem. The world has caught up and most brands are making cute workout clothes and most people are wearing them. There’s even a Stitch Fix/ Trunk Club type service for fitness clothes now (sweat style). Hell, even Beyonce is coming out with a fitness line. (Ivy Park. Beyonce x Top Shop.) Which, for the record, is not fucking authentic because anyone who can pay someone to cook for them and train them is kind of cheating. Carrie Underwood. Kate Hudson. Gweneth. Britney. Jessica. Not like, lipo- cheating (although, maybe they have, I don’t know), but still. Just because you’re a star and keep in shape, and/or already have a clothing line you’re looking to extend, doesn’t mean you’re a fitness person.

Anyway. The only problem left for me to bitch about (other than that) in fitness fashion is clingy tech shirts. That’s it. They still suck, they still make everyone look lumpy and terrible, and they hold on to B.O. like a stink bank. And maybe the’ll never go away until I’m somehow made head of design at Nike or Under Armor (insert dream sequence here). But just one terrible crime against fitness fashion isn’t much to feed this beast.

What’s a girl to do??? Be positive?!? Just focus on putting cute WorkOutfits together? Like another vapid fashion blogger who for some reason can never look at the camera? Blech. I dunno, man.

I guess I’ll just keep on reporting on what’s coming out and how to find stuff that makes you feel powerful. Just because shit’s pretty good now, doesn’t mean we all can’t keep upping our badassery. (see: proenza schouler, balmain) Onward! Excelsior!

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