No mo Jawbone. :( Hello Fitbit. :)

I have been a dedicated fan of the Jawbone Up24 and Up2 fitness trackers for the last few years, but NO LONGER! I lost my first one, because there’s no clasp on an UP24 so I looped it around the top of my pants because I wanted stroller steps to count, and it fell off. D’oh!

Then I bought an Up2. And they had to replace it because the strap tore. AND, they didn’t have a black one to replace it with so I had to accept a light grey one, which I knew would look filthy and gross and cheap like a sad dead rubber band, and it did. But I had no choice, so I wore it until…

The band on that third one, the replacement for the second one, JUST TORE!  I emailed Jawbone’s customer service and they sent me a “we got your email” email, but nothing after that. It’s been weeks. So I called, and their message is basically a half-step better than dealing with Comcast—which means getting slapped with a glove filled with rocks instead of slapped with a glove filled with rocks with spikes on it…the message basically says “We really suck, you will not reach a person, you can try emailing. Cheers!”

So, fuck that shit. I’m done. Also, Fitbit finally makes bands that aren’t giant and ugly and hideous, so that worked out well for me, timing-wise.

Meet my new jam! Fitbit Alta.

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And yes, of course I got the special edition gold one. And yes, of course I already have a pink leather strap for it. Obviously. Come on.

Fitbit Alta Super Brief Review:

So far, so good. The straps are very easy to switch out. The bracelet has a very secure clasping system. The Fitbit Alta does seem a little more rugged than the UP2 was, so hopefully it won’t tear like those jokers did. It’s super easy to use. The app is fine. And it lets me know when I’m getting a call or a text, which is a little bit “Hey, calm down, you’re just a pretty pedometer OK? Stay in your lane.” But you can’t blame a bracelet for trying.

 

 

Today’s WorkOutfit

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Admittedly, “work” today means worky work, like sitting on my ass at the computer work. Dressed like a dude in joggers, kicks, and a jacket. And 30 second hair. They have it so easy they don’t even know.

Joggers: Gapfit, Jacket: Mountain Hardware, Shoes: Toms, Tracker: Up2 by Jawbone

WorkOutFits post-baby, and what it’s like to watch your body change without your permission.

…or lack thereof, if we’re being honest here.

Here are my IG posts of workoutfits/ workout days from today back to when I was 36 month preggo.  IG = @iamaimeeschewe  Starting with today’s pic.

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Today: Day 8 of Bikini Body Mommy Challenge 4 and day 1 of Whole30. More on both of those later. 

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Self-tanner fail.

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Crunches and planks for all.

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I finally “fit” into my favorite green tunic again. And by that I mean I can put it on, but it sure as hell doesn’t fit like a tunic should. Also I lost my UP24 fitness tracker and I am TOTALLY BUMMED ABOUT IT.

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The good news is: where I live, you can throw a scarf on top of a WorkOutFit and you’ll be the best dressed lady around. That is also the bad news.

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All I want for birthday is some new fresh kicks.

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Sad about having no muscles anymore. I guess a year of not working out (basically) will do that to you. Babies. Jerks.

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I’m pretty into my purple and black tie-dye LuluLemon Wonder Under fold-over leggings. Fold-over really just means I always wear them unfolded/up over my poppin’ fresh dough. And of course, always, Nike Frees. The black tongue and laces really make this pair.  I love them to bits.

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Ah yes. This is me trying to get a feature from Fabletics on Lauren Conrad’s blog. I didn’t try very hard. Meaning I only sent in this one image. One time. But dang. Good hair day, right? Also, that is total angle trickery. Everyone looks skinny with their body cut off and from above. Try it. I do really dig that shirt though. Fabletics. Breeze top I think.

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so hipstergram.

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trying to psych up to get back into the swing of things. trying.

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Same Fabletics top. Different color. My wardrobe choices (read: what fits) right now are very 90s/ bold colors and black/ WWF/ Punky Brewster…purples, teals, black and bleachy tie-dye…not sure what’s going on. I actually wore the same type of clothes in 8th grade: tunic, sports bra top, leggings. Weirrrrrrrrd.

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See? What’d I tell you? Double black tie dye. So obnoxious. So Macho Man Randy Savage. What’s next? Zubaz?

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This is my cardio. Walking. I’m so hard core right now. Not. Can’t wait to be 100%. Srsly. 4rl.

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More with the teal. Hey, lets add neon green! Those are the mom boobs. Gotta say. I’m not a fan. I was totally fine with having smaller boobs and I can’t wait for these jobbies to go away. Oooh. Look how shiny my new fitness ball is. Ooooh. Silver.

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I was proud of my angles and art direction.

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So this was basically my all day post-baby uniform for the summer. Joggers and some kind of a baggy but with big arm holes so you see my bra type of shirt. The top and bottom are both Athleta. The top is sold out now (summer item) but the bottoms are the Metro Slouch capris and you can get them in full length for fall. I recommend them. Comfy. Not tight but not sloppy. If you have an ass, that is.

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This is me starting to work out again. And by that I mean doing my prenatal workout as my postpartum (that just means after baby, not postpartum depression) workout. Note the lack of waist and obvious tip toe leg-lengthening trick.

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Going further back in time, two months after giving birth, even less-little in the middle. Also, I braided my hair one day.

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angles and trickery!! I’m twice as wide when I’m facing forward.

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I thought I’d be using the Ergo Baby Carrier a lot. Too bad baby hated it. He likes the Bjorn.  We’ll try this one again when he grows out of that.

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This was right after my 6 weeks post-baby check up. When my doctor said I could work out again. But she also said I should go to physical therapy. So…yeah. Now it’s 6 months later and I’m basically still fixin’ to get ready to get back in shape. But that’s better than peeing myself for the rest of my life. Probably.

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And this was my belly at 36 weeks. I’m so glad to be not pregnant anymore! Love the baby. But man I LOVE being NOT PREGNANT. aaaaaah. The best thing about being pregnant is appreciating not being pregnant.

I haven’t posted a ton of pics because 1. I haven’t been working out a ton and 2. I don’t fit into much. I basically have three pairs of leggings that I rotate and two big baggy black tunics. That’s what’s comfortable and flowy and makes me the least sad when I look in the mirror. Your body changes a lot when you’re pregnant, and then again after you have a baby (and are breast feeding), and then again as time goes on, and then again when you stop breast feeding. (I hope.)

During pregnancy my waist got thicker before the baby bump showed up. And my boobs got bigger and hurt like hell. I am a pear / T-Rex (little in the middle but she got much back) with a medium-small upper body, so this was not fun for me. Me no likey big booby.  And I gained some cushioning all around. But it wasn’t too incredibly grotesque. Not as freakish as it could have been. I think the baby just took up organ space before growing out toward the world. Sure fucking felt like it. But not as bad as it could have been. I mean. I was still pregnant. It was gross and weird and a total alien parasite situation. But it could have been worse. So I’m thankful for that.

I walked a fair bit, but couldn’t do much more. I had no energy and bouncing was NOT an option. I stopped running pretty early on. It just felt like my organs were going to fall out. So…nope! I guess I didn’t do enough pelvic floor work before and during pregnancy. (be warned!)

Afterward, I wore a belly wrap corset thing and a hip minimizer (highly recommend, more on those later). And after six weeks I started walking again. And I’ve done some barre workouts, but I’ve been taking it very slowly and gradually because I’m still in pelvic floor rehab. (Long story. I’ll write a thing on that soon. I’m not “injured” any more than anyone else who’s ever carried a baby, but it’s important to rehab those muscles first so you don’t pee your pants your whole life. Other countries know this. America apparently doesn’t. Probably not a coincidence that my Physical Therapists are from New Zealand and India. )

Anyway, I’m just trying to give you an idea of what happens to your shape after pregnancy, even without workout out or watching what you eat too much. (me.) My waist is getting smaller on its own/ returning back to a more “me” shape. What isn’t changing is the boobs and upper body weight. Like the fat arms and armpits and upper back and whatnot. That’s still disorienting because it’s not my natural body shape and all of my clothes fit differently/ don’t fit because of the damn boobs. Everything is a crop top all of a sudden. It’s ridiculous. But that should change soon enough, when I stop with the breast feeding. I look forward to that.

I also don’t want you to think that not working out for 6 months is normal. (Or that I just said “Fuck it, I’m a mom!” I didn’t.) You can totally work out. And I could have gotten to this point quicker if I had been more religious about doing my physical therapy.  But I wasn’t. (I will be now, though. Promise. I’m sick of this.) So it’s taking a long time to get to the point where I can do all the fun high impact/ plank/ quick movement/ boot camp/ real exercise stuff again.  And to be able to wear my ninety seven different pairs of black workout pants.

Also, I should note that I’m finally realizing how much of this shit it is out of my control. Hormones tell your body to store fat because it’s going to use it or baby stuff and baby feeding stuff. Hormones tell your body you don’t need some of that anymore. Hormones tell you to lay the fuck down because your body needs all the energy for other functions you don’t even know are happening. I never went totally nuts food-wise or workout-wise while pregnant or after. I’ve just been normal, up and down, sometimes a total pig, sometimes not -me. Watching my waist get thicker and thinner despite my intake and output has taken some pressure off and given me a little faith in my body actually maybe deciding it wants to be smaller one day and it all happening pretty naturally. Maybe. I mean. That would be cool, right? Is that how normal people think and live? Huh. Must be nice.

But I’m for sure going to get more serious about my PT and keep on working in more working out.

And at least for a little while longer I’ll still be in tunics and leggings town. Hope you like purple tie dye and Punky Brewster…

 

Fitbit Fashion

Wearables. Fitness trackers. I’ve been using one for almost ten years. It was called a Pedometer and it cost no more than $20. But now there are bracelets, so I’M IN. I’ve been using a Jawbone UP24 and I dig it. It looks less clunky than the fitbit bracelets, has a great, user-friendly app, and tracks sleep.

But if you have a Fitbit, people are working to make them less fugly. Here’s one I noticed on my Esty feed recently: http://etsy.me/1KGZQDS

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New hot shit.

Yep. Still pregnant. So I’m just going to keep on fantasy shopping. Enjoy.

KORAL ACTIVEWEAR

This stuff is what Victoria’s Secret models probably actually wear to workout.

Lustrus Legging: $92 on revolveclothing.com

lustrus legging

Caliber Hoodie: $190

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Summit Bra and Transport Leggings: $110 and $118 shopbop.com

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MICHI NY

Sexy / Edgy / Badassness  MichiNY.com

Revolt Tee $95

revolt tee $95

Lure Shirt $158

michy lure $158

 

Luna Legging $179

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Helix Bra $169

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JAWBONE

And of course, a half a year or so after I get my Jawbone UP24, they come out with a cuter one: UP3 by Jawbone  $179 coming soon. Jawbone.com  Self Magazine is showing one in grey. GREY! I love grey more than people. Definitely like this better than the really bracelet-y Tory Burch type thingies that other trackers are making. Keep it sporty, y’all.

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HEROINE SPORT heroinesport.com

This is a new “hybrid activewear collection” from NY designer Nima Taherzadeh of NIMA. Most of the stuff is OK, sure, but I’ve seen it. But the bras are quite interesting. You know. If you’re a skinny little thing who can go topless when you work out. Bless your heart.

Performance Bra: $75

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X-Bra: $85

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SPLITS 59

Sexy slim pants and stuff favored by Dailey Method instructors. splits59.com

Langley Slim Fit Tight $106

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Nova Trailblazer Performance Capri III $98Screen Shot 2015-01-31 at 3.43.35 PM

 

 

$150 ACTIVITY TRACKER VS $20 PEDOMETER

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WHO WILL WIN?

Have you noticed all the articles about activity trackers lately? Apparently I have, because I bought one. I’ve always thought: that’s just an expensive pedometer, you idiots. But then I got it in my head that I wanted to go to fat camp, looked up what it costs, and said “waaaa. I can’t afford fat camp, so I’m going to buy myself a fancy tracker.” I’m a very rational person. Anyway, that’s how I ended up with a Jawbone UP24 around my wrist. Screen Shot 2014-05-14 at 7.31.52 PM

MMmm. So tech-y. 

I’ve been using a little $20 pedometer for years. It works just fine, and it’s just as motivating as it needs to be. (The $10 ones break too easily.) It taught me that when I work full time in an ad agency and don’t walk to work, I only get 2500 steps a day. (A normal human being, not even working out, is supposed to get 10,000.) That is useful, life changing information. You could give $20 to a friend and ask her to tell you to slap you every hour and walk more, but she won’t be able to paint so stark a picture about how little you actually move and how close to inanimate you actually are. Processed with VSCOcam with g3 preset

LIFE CHANGER!

So whatchoo got, Jawbone? Can you top that? I’ve been wearing the Jawbone UP24 for two weeks and here are the pros and cons:

PRO: wearing an activity tracker does communicate to you and others that fitness is a priority in your life.

PRO: It tracks your sleep. And it has made me realize I’m getting a lot less sleep than I thought I was.

PRO: It gives you updates on your progress and tips throughout the day. Like when it saw me only get 6.5 hrs of sleep for four days in a row it told me to catch up on some zzs over the weekend. Aw. It cares about me!

PRO: it’s always synching to your iphone via Bluetooth and the battery lasts a good few days.

PRO: You can set it to buzz to give you reminders when you’ve been inactive for too long! You don’t need to pay a friend $20 to slap you every hour and tell you to get up and take a walk.

PRO: smart sleep alarm: it can wake you within 20 min of your planned wake up time, but at a point when you’re in a light sleep, and before you slip back into a deeper one. Less zombie-like mornings.

PRO: I don’t have to clip it on my pants or put it in my pocket or take it out of my zipper pocket in boot camp when we lie on our back for abs.

PRO: you can synch it up with lots of other apps like My Fitness Buddy and track my run for even more accountability and insights.

CON: I’m pretty sure it counts hand clapping and bumpy car rides as steps. So that means it probably counts regular car rides? That’s not cool. Pedometers do not do that.

CON: I’ve somehow lost the USB plug and I can’t charge it until I find that stupid thing. The charge lasts a few days. The pedometer uses a watch battery that lasts months.

CON: no heart rate monitor, so no calorie burn feedback. Some do have this. They are big ugly watches as far as I can tell.

CON or PRO? no display on the bracelet itself. At first I thought I wanted a display, so I was considering the Nike fuel band. But I didn’t want to deal with made up fuel units (nike tracks “fuel” not calories or steps I don’t think).  And I thought it might be distracting to have flashing lights going off all day, so, I went with the jawbone instead of the Nike. It is nice to see how many steps you’ve gotten at a glance. But it’s on your phone, so all you have to do is glance at your phone. And it shows you what percentage of your step goal you’re at so far, so that’s extra motivation.

CON: I’ve been told that the new iphones can use their accelerometer like a pedometer and there are apps that basically turn it into an activity tracker. If you have it on your body at all times. Which I don’t. But, you know, FYI. Those exist. And many are free.

CONCLUSION:  Up 24 Loses. Technically. Rationally. Why? Because if you want a bracelet tracker, there are cheaper trackers that I’m sure do the same thing, and work with more platforms. And unless it’s a (big ugly) heart-rate tracking one, it doesn’t do anything that fancy. It is a useful app to hub all of your tracking in one place, but I don’t think that’s really worth $150.

But that doesn’t mean I don’t love it. 🙂 Processed with VSCOcam with g3 preset

EMOTIONAL RATIONALIZATION BONUS!  Hey. If seeing a fancy little thing on your wrist all day makes you more committed to getting your steps and whatnot, maybe that is worth something. And it does make a statement. And it is a conversation piece. And it’s easier to keep track of than a little slippery thing you have to put in your pocket every day. I have lost my little pedometer a few times. Pedometer = “Wait. What pair of pants was I wearing yesterday? Did I put it in my jacket pocket?” Plus, the sleep and inactivity alert things on the UP 24 are pretty rad. (I’m sure other trackers have that too, though.) But seriously, if you’re broke but want to track your steps, look for an app, or go on amazon and get this little pedometer. The ones at the drugstores and Target have springs in them, and they break. I’ve gone through many. I like the Omron brand. They’re solid. This isn’t the one I have, but I think it’s the one that came after. Close enough!

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